The College Football thread

“Is football season over yet?”

“Chili! My man! You've come out of your coma!

Football season isn't over yet, and you haven't missed your chance to root for the Gators this year!

Man, I know you're excited about that. About as excited as your last prostate exam I'll bet.”

“Bama starts the season next year in the Georgia Dome against Virginia Tech. We'll be replacing a QB, 3 OL's including one who will likely go in the top 5 picks in the draft, both TE's (we run mostly 2 TE sets), and an all conference free safety. I don't like our chances against VT. We have a recruiting class to haul in, spring practice, and fall practice until then so anything can happen.”

“I can't believe that the drop from #1 to #2 in the Big East means the difference between the Orange Bowl and a Monday afternoon bowl in a broken down stadium against the #10 team in the ACC.

Rutgers needs to win the Big East championship and jump to the Big Ten. This league sucks dead monkey balls.”

“Hey, deadmokenys gotta have some fun!”

“Don't worry Violin, you guys will have all you can handle with the #10 ACC team. I don't know how you guys travel to bowl games, but I suspect you fell to papajohns because the Big east teams below you travel better. not that many people travel to this bowl anyway. Not to mention that you guys are just 7-5 (looks like 4th place in teh big east)
last edited: 12/09/08 6:16:57 AM”

“I am forgetting...how was Ohio State supposed to Stack up against LSU last year? (LOL).”

“Does this mean Violin is coming to Birmingham? Wow, I could actually meet fiddle boy in real life, living color? Dunadan would be most jealous. I'd love to meet ya' if you come to town.”

“go Penn State!”

“Being a Texas Citizen...(oh and I despise the Longhorns) I am hoping Oklahoma just gets a revision of the BCS championship from last year (LOL)”

“Violin, Schiano, being a defensive guy, is a bit offensively conservative by nature.

Once he decided to open up that Rutgers offense, good things began to happen. Rutgers should have won some of those early games. They’re a good football team.

I have respect for the Big East just from their bowl record. They don’t have any true national champion powerhouses, but they play good football and can sometimes play with anyone.




Dayhiker, we lose three offensive linemen next year as well. But we rotate so many guys that it won’t be like we’re losing a tremendous amount. Some of the battles for starting positions have been very close and it’s just been a difference of experience. Our backups have got plenty of experience now. Florida has recruited some top rated offensive linemen for the last few years (this year being no different) so I’m hoping that the chemistry is still good on our o-line next year.

The Pouncy’s (sophomore twins) will anchor our line next year. Maurkice is the center and Mike is a guard. We lose Trautwein, Tartt, and Watkins. The replacements are solid and we should have good rotation again due to recruiting. The unknown is chemistry. And that’s always a major factor with an o-line.

We were supposed to run a two tight-end set this year as well. But senior All-American Cornelius Ingram had a season ending injury in fall practice. I’d love to have him back next year but I don’t know if that’s possible. Sophomore Aaron Hernandez stepped up to replace him. Hernandez was instrumental against Alabama when he took Tebow’s shovel pass and rumbled for a first down close to the goal line, and again when he made that great leaping catch for a first down late in the game.

Harvin may go this year but he may not. He’s been injured so often that the pros may not want to take a chance on him this year. Depending on what the pros say this year, he may come back just to hope he plays injury-free and improves his draft status.

Running backs Moody, Demps, Rainey, and James all return. They’ll be joined by a couple of others who may get in the mix.

Our receivers? Florida’s always loaded with good receivers.


Defense looks very promising next year. Our defensive tackles are a bit undersized and inexperienced this year. 315lb freshman (he’ll be a sophomore) Omar Hunter (#1 rated HS d-tackle) should play next year. He’ll play alongside 300lb Terron Sanders, 305lb Lawrence Marsh, 300lb Torrey Davis, 300lb Brandon Antwine, and 300lb John Brown. I know Brown’s a five-star guy. I don’t think any of the others were rated below four stars. Freshman Matt Patchan has possibilities too. He was a backup d-tackle this year after being recruited as an offensive lineman. His motor runs at full speed always. He’s 6-6 but undersized at 270. He needs to put on some weight in the off-season. Those are all young guys. We’ve also got a bunch of four and five-star defensive ends. The defensive line should be much improved for 2009.

This year, Athlon’s preseason magazine rated Florida’s linebackers #2 only to USC’s incredible bunch. If we lose Spikes, there will be a drop-off in the middle. But Ryan Stamper has plenty of playing time and may fill the role nicely. Florida has been linebacker U for some time. Bam Hardmon was replaced by Channing Crowder, who was replaced by Brandon Spikes (NFL guys all). I’m hoping the drop-off won’t be too noticeable as in the past. What a bunch of names for middle linebackers: Bam, Crowder, Spikes, and Stamper.

We’ve recruited some of the highest rated defensive backs during the past few years. Our defensive backfield should only be better next year. This year's starting cornerbacks are Janorius Jenkins who is a freshman and Joe Haden who is a sophomore.

The real test is chemistry. I think, with young college football players, it’s better to be hungry rather than to have high expectations placed on your shoulders. It’s hard to maintain a high level of focus consistently. We have great chemistry this year. We didn’t in 2007 after the 2006 mythical NC. There seemed to be a sense of entitlement with the 2007 bunch. How well Florida plays in 2009 will probably have more to do with leadership and team chemistry than talent. Florida is loaded with talent.
last edited: 12/09/08 8:06:31 AM”

“Bama only has 9 seniors this year. This class is from the depths of our probation. I still don't understand the math. We'll lose 10 when you include Andre Smith. We're planning on signing about 25. We must have more attrition to come from our current team, plus there will be some academic casualties on the incoming class. We're looking to have another top 5 class.”

“

We'll lose 10 when ...
We're planning on signing ...
We must have more attrition ...
We're looking to have ..."
dayhike

I'm confused! What's with all this "we" stuff? Are you the new coach or what?

Or are you just a carried-away bystander like arclite?
last edited: 12/09/08 11:58:37 AM”

“I'm a 2 time alumnus of the University of Alabama. When I say we, I mean it in the context of my school.”

“A team doesn't win on its own. It takes a program. "We" are part of teh program”

“Very moving there Hyway....not exactly a "one for the Gipper" more like a "Lets get out there and try not to Suck too bad."”

“Gary Danielson was hospitalized.

ATLANTA, GA � At approximately 11 pm Saturday night, CBS sports announcer Gary Danielson realized it was time to head for the emergency room.


�Every single commercial for a male virility pill, like Viagra or Cialis, says that if your erection lasts for more than four hours, then you should call a physician,� Danielson said. �Well I had the biggest Tebowner of my life yesterday, and it started about 3 pm eastern time and it wasn�t gone by 11 pm, and I knew it wasn�t even close to being gone, so I came to the emergency room.
�

The Tebowner seems to have been a direct result of Tim Tebow�s dominant performance in the SEC Championship game against the Alabama Crimson Tide. As of the publication of this piece, Danielson remained hospitalized with a lot of attention being paid to him, as doctors worked in vain to figure out what they could do to treat the Tebowner.



�It�s a really difficult thing to treat,� said Dr. Pervez Mushtaf, of the Atlanta Regional Medical Center. �Tebowners start off and they feel so great, you�re like, �Damn, I could feel like this forever, I hope that this feeling never ends,� that sort of thing. But then you find yourself about four hours later and you�re like, �Jesus, I mean, I love Tim Tebow, but holy crap, this thing has got to go away.
��

A Tebowner is defined by the American Journal of Medicine as a �severe swelling of the genitalia resulting from long-term visual exposure to the exploits of Tim Tebow on the college football field.
�

Tebowners occur naturally following viewing of Florida games for many people, with an extremely high prevalence in television announcers and Florida graduates.


�I�m not sure why, but we treat a lot of TV announcers who have severe Tebowners,� Mushtaf said. �Barely a week goes by where I don�t spend part of Sunday chucking cold water on Brent Musburger�s hoo-hah, if you know what I mean.
�

As for Danielson, doctors are keeping their fingers crossed.


�We�ve tried cold water, and we�ve tried ice cubes, and we�ve even tried naked pictures of Rosie O�Donnell,� Mushtaf said. �Nothing has worked so far. But now we�ve got him in there watching this year�s game between the Iowa Hawkeyes and Indiana Hoosiers. That ought to make it go away.
�

Tebowners are a serious problem in the southeastern part of the country, and long-lasting Tebowners have been negatively affecting men across Florida for the last two years. It is a much more severe affliction than the fast-spreading Peter Warrdick that plagued Tallahassee briefly in the early part of the 1990s.


�We�ve treated more than 700 severe Tebowners in the past two years,� said a spokesperson for Gainesville Presbyterian Hospital. �I�ve never encountered such a severe disease. I almost hope that Mr. Tebow thinks of the good people of Northern Florida and takes his talents to the NFL. Let some other doctor deal with Joe Buck.”

“Ha!”

“Dayhiker, that sounds like it was written by one of those cynical, angry, coach potato sports writers from the northeast.


You're just jealous because, according to the system before 1966...

FLORIDA IS ALREADY THE NATIONAL CHAMPION!

I'm gonna go out and get me a varsity jacket and sew on some patches so I can show everyone how great we are.
last edited: 12/10/08 7:07:54 AM”

“Yeah but they have no tradition...”

“Dang right Nigal. Alabama has no tradition. Very perceptive of you.”

“Can we start talking about basketball yet?”

“On the football thread? I wish we were ready to talk about basketball, but I don't think this is the year for that either.”

“Speaking of basketball, I have tickets to the KU/Tennessee game. Want to put a friendly wager on this game? The Jayhawks are young this year and have already lost to Syracuse. How's that for baitin' the hook?
I'll pony up some Free State ale.”

“Chili, you and Nigal just love to stir the pot, don't you?

Nigal's secret recipe has always included BS.

This year, yours sounds like its close to including arsenic. DON'T DO IT, MAN!




Dunadan, how can you even think about basketball before this historic event?


Kansas is playing in back-to-back bowls!


This is huge. This is momentous! This is unprecedented! It's big.


You should be preparing for your late December trip to the Insight Bowl at Sun Devil Stadium in Tempe, Arizona.


Think about the desert in winter. Think about the Grand Canyon in winter. Don't think about hiding inside a box to escape from weather that ain't fit for man nor beast.


New Years in Tempe!”

“Dunadan

I will cover that bet with a local ale, yazoo.

http://www.yazoobrew.com/yazoopaleale.html”

“I love it, Chili! That looks like mighty good drinkin'!
I'll let you know how the game goes. Maybe I'll streak at halftime.

Hey, Arc! You are right. I must make atonement to the Jayhawk Nation. (All five of them). I will be singing "Tequila Sunrise" and thinking of our team in the desert tonight with a million stars all around. And, even though I'm not gay, there's nothing wrong with singing Tequila Sunrise while thinking about the football team.”

“I think arc is suffering from tradition envy.”

“Yeah, it's bad enough that Arc's team has to have Illinois colors. No tradition just makes it worse.”

“Laugh it up, funny boys.

I think Nigal is suffering from football team envy. Don't worry, nige ol' boy. In a year or two the Weasels may be good enough to play Pop Warner Pee-Wee ball... maybe.

Certainly The Ohio State is looking forward to their traditional beating of the vanquished victims next year. You must be getting used to that traditional bent-over position, eh Nigal?

Your life is its own punishment.




And if I were Dunadan, living in Kansas, rooting for Kansas,... Holy Cow. Where do you begin? O sota hogan.

Saturday
High- 66
Sunday
High- 74

Gee, that's sort of like your weather isn't it, Dunadan? I'll be thinking about you as I ride my scoot out to the beach.

Think about me as you're shoveling your driveway.

Your life is its own punishment.
last edited: 12/12/08 5:55:47 PM”

“60 - 70 degrees in December?!!

That's sissy weather!”

“No violin, it's less than optimal motorcycle riding weather. 75-85 is about perfect.

As you can see from this:
http://www.weather.com/weather/tenday/32607?from=36hr_topnav_undeclared

next week will be about perfect.


Sissy? You've got a screwed up value system there, violin.

I've got an idea. Why don't you move to the highest taxed, highest population density area of the country? There you can wallow in filthy, air polluted, overpriced real estate while you contemplate the meaning of sissy. It's in the dictionary right before stupidity, monumental.




Yessir, you sound a bit like Nigal and his traditions. I’ll be thinking about Nigal's traditions over the next month. Like the one where he plants his behind onto a couch and scratches his nads while his greasy, potato chip stained, fingers smear his old Scooby-doo jamies to the artificial glow of television.

There’s nothing like that tradition of watching your team play in a bowl game. Oh wait… some of us don’t have that tradition this year…pity.

But at least some folks still get to have their tradition of huddling in heated little boxes to the artificial glow of television. Michigan, Ohio, Kansas, and NJ, … ahhh paradise destinations for any winter traveler. It’s gotta be hard to book flights to those wonderlands of winter bliss.




Meanwhile our bowl tradition continues:

Hotel De Soleil
http://www.southbeachluxuryhotels.com/De-Soleil-South-Beach.shtml




Yessir, some folks got some fine traditions there. And good luck with them.
last edited: 12/13/08 4:40:26 PM”

“DeeeYammm!!! (cue the banjo music) You call a Swamper a sissy, and he attacks your tradition, WITH A DOUBLE BARREL SHOTGUN!

It's a proven fact that people who live in the colder climates are much tougher and much happier than those who live in the whimpy temperate climates. A study by the CDC, www.kissmyroseyredflorida.org, shows plainly that those migrating to southern climes lose their teeth at twice the rate of the hardy northern stock in the USA.
There is a long TRADITION for freezing your ass off while waiting for spring to come so that you can watch the grass grow. That is why most northerners, especially Midwesterners have such big behinds, so that they can regularly freeze them off. This is well documented in a paper accessed at www.doctorswithbrassballslikethemonkeywelldigger.com.
Since I know the former references might not suffice for our fact-addicted Gator fan, I made a trip up to the campus of the University of Kansas. The day I went, (hmmm, it seems like just this morning), the weather started out at a balmy 53 degrees. In the time it took me to visit and return home, the temperature had dropped to 35 and was headed downward from there. Anecdotally, the only people I saw on my visit to the campus were extremely TOUGH people. (no sissies) While I was there, I spoke with a professor of natural history who confirmed my beliefs that the only tough things you find in Florida are actual alligators, and they stink to high heaven. He also directed me to another website, www.coldweathermakesyoufeellikeOneInchWang.com.
So, you can give up your silly libby argument that you even know what toughness or tradition are. My argument is air-tight, as you can see.
ROCK
CHALK
JAYHAWK
KKKAAAAAYYY
UUUUUUUUUUUU
!!!!!!!!!!!!!
(a traditional chant since the 19th Century)”

“Yeah, and I hear tell northerners consider it manly to beat themselves upside the head with hammers. Ice fishing..uh yup... I hear that's popular in places like Kansas, Fargo, and Michigan don't ya know. In NJ, they fish for brown trout in the open sewers.

I suppose temperate climates could be considered wimpy. I wouldn't know, I live in a sub-tropical climate.

I'll tell the boys down at SOCOM you think they're a bunch of wimps, Dunadan. They'll probably want to send you a nice Christmas card in appreciation.

Yessir, here it is 8pm and I thought I'd enjoy a nice cup of coffee on my back porch... in my short sleeve shirt. Yessir, it's a balmy 65 out there...brrrrrrrrr.

Forecast:
Mon. high- 79
Tues. high- 81
Wed. high- 82
Thu. high- 79

Wait 'till I get my lake house built. I'd invite you and the family down here, Dunadan, but you're much too tough for that.


Hog jowls roasting on an open fire....”

“You forgot highest per capita income, arc.

We can afford to pay for things like a "furnace" and "lift tickets".”

“"I live in a sub-tropical climate."

I don't think so! How 'bout semitropical?

While you were lounging with your coffee, I was knocking out weights on the machines at the physical fitness facility. Then I did my usual 100 sit-ups and 50 push-ups before a hot shower. Next was a swim in the pool followed by lounging it in the steam room. Another hot shower and it was time coffee in the Resource Cafe.

I didn't realize that we lived so close. So I figured that I better improve my condition in case our paths should cross. Nothing like being prepared! I even went to a Martial Arts Class Wednesday. Planning to attend another one tonight, etc.

Happy Holidays to you.
last edited: 12/15/08 5:36:34 AM”

“How 'bout semitropical, nowslimmer?

I'm in Gainesville, nowslimmer. Here's a site about visiting our beautiful city:

"Gainesville has a humid subtropical climate."
http://www.visitgainesville.com/attractions/item.aspx?id=46


UF provides some good information for growing subtropical peaches if you live around here:

Strategies for Subtropical Peach Production in Florida.
http://edis.ifas.ufl.edu/document_hs364




Wow! All that at 8pm? You work entirely too hard for me.

I just got back from the gym myself. Next it will be wrist exercises. I'll be twisting that throttle back as I head for Cedar Key.


Happy Holidays and a very Merry Christmas to you too.”

“You're right, you can get away with subtropical, however sub-tropical does not fly!

http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/sub-tropical

No results found for sub-tropical
------------------------------------
http://dictionary.reference.com/search?q=semitropical
semitropical - 3 dictionary results
------------------------------------

But it does get tricky and I've found other results, too. So I'll accept anyway you want to express it.

In case of errors above, I'm being rushed and pushed off the computer.

Hope you enjoy the Bowl Games.”

“Nowslimmer, actually, as soon as you said semi-tropical I was about to agree with you. Semi-tropical sounded more correct.

I've noticed a disturbing trend over the past few years. I sometimes have trouble searching for the right words. I think it's about time to go back to my chess computer for some brain exercise. Apparently, just reading books hasn't provided me with enough mind stimulation.

I'm not ready to lose brain function. I could degenerate into one of those drooling "tradition" fools or, worse yet, something pathetic like violin.


However, I did some research after your post:


Gainesville FL is at 29.69N latitude

The subtropics are the zones of the Earth immediately north and south of the tropic zone, which is bounded by the Tropic of Cancer and the Tropic of Capricorn, at latitude 23.5 ° north and south. The term 'subtropical' describes the climatic region found adjacent to the tropics, usually between 20 and 35 degrees latitude in both hemispheres, but occasionally found at slightly higher latitudes.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Subtropics


Humid subtropical climate
http://wapedia.mobi/en/Humid_subtropical


Subtropics
http://www.nationmaster.com/encyclopedia/Subtropics


Moist Subtropical Mid-Latitude Climates

This climate generally has warm and humid summers with mild winters. Its extent is from 30 to 50° of latitude mainly on the eastern and western borders of most continents. During the winter, the main weather feature is the mid-latitude cyclone. Convective thunderstorms dominate summer months. Three minor types exist: Cfa - humid subtropical; Cs - Mediterranean; and Cfb - marine. The humid subtropical climate (Cfa) has hot muggy summers and frequent thunderstorms. Winters are mild and precipitation during this season comes from mid-latitude cyclones. A good example of a Cfa climate is the southeastern USA.
http://www.physicalgeography.net/fundamentals/7v.html


“…All of Florida, except the Lower Keys, has a subtropical climate…”
http://fshs.org/Proceedings/Password%20Protected/1959%20Vol.%2072/301-303(Wolfe).pdf


“…Florida is characterized by a humid subtropical climate…”
http://www.bio.unc.edu/Faculty/peet/pubs/FL-model.pdf


So Gainesville Florida is definitely classified as subtropical. The research I've posted does not conflict with the definitions you posted but merely serves to reinforce their meaning.


Thanks, nowslimmer, I will enjoy the bowl games. Unfortunately I won't be attending our bowl in Miami. Ticket prices are absurd for a college event. One of the reasons I love college football is precisely because it isn't the pros with their astronomical salaries and ticket prices.

I've enjoyed all the bowls I've been to over the years. I enjoyed going to the Outback Bowl in 2003 and 2005. Both times we played Iowa and both times I really enjoyed the friendliness of the Iowa fans.

Bowls are a great environment because the fans don't seem to have their egos tied into the outcome of the game. The rivalries aren't usually emotionally overheated and the fans don't take winning and losing personally.

Last year I was at the Capital One Bowl and enjoyed being around the Michigan fans. They were a happy group (even before they won the game) because they all seemed very grateful to be in Florida in winter.


And that's one thing that makes many of the bowls so great is that they are in Florida. Imagine these hypothetical puppies:


The Frosbitemyass Bowl- played in Michigan

The DorothyIwanttogohome Bowl- played in Kansas

The Fuggedabouditthattheairsmellsawful Bowl- played in NJ.



Talk about some nightmare scenarios.
last edited: 12/16/08 6:50:36 AM”

“arclite - The main problem was whether or not to use a hyphen in the word.

http://www.ask.com/web?q=Proper+Use+of+Hyphens+Dashes&qsrc=6&o=10601

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hyphen

I had located and read most of the material, which you presented in your post. However, you did a much better job than I could have ever done of organizing the material and presenting it for any interested readers. Thank you.

Next, one could get into the problems about compound words. For example, my use of "Bagnights" was questioned. I was able to locate somewhere in some "Rules of English," that one was permitted to form compound words.”

“Slim, we need to tell that to my spellcheck. I keep using words like backroads and my spellcheck keeps flagging me. As when I use it in the sentences:

"It was 80 degrees on Wednesday so I rode my motorcycle through the backroads of Ocala National Forest and over to 3 Bananas Restaurant in Crescent City, overlooking Lake Crescent, for lunch. On Thursday, I enjoyed a glorious ride on the backroads to Cedar Key to have a fresh blackened grouper sandwich overlooking the sparkling waters of the Gulf of Mexico."


Although I've always lived by the motto "Question Authority", but I'm not one for making up rules to suit myself. In order to question authority we first have to acknowledge that their are greater authorities than the made up one in our own self-centered head.

Funny that you've got a book called Rules of English. I've got one called Errors in English. I like to follow most rules (instead of being a selfish SOB and making up rules to suit myself) that keep society from degenerating into self-centered chaos. My mother used to say, "Can't you speak the king's English?" whenever I used bad grammar.

I don't want to be the National Socialist German Workers' Party English gestapo but it bothers me when I hear common usage on TV such as, "He told the both of us" or "He speaks bad." Those make me cringe. Well, I ain't perfect neither so I'll just have to live with it.

At least we have an understanding about subtropical. I learned something there.


Speaking of learning, I'm about to learn how much like "child's play" it is to figure out these bowls.

Using the rules for past Football God contests, I'm making my picks for the 2008 bowl season:

Bowls from 12/20/2008 to 1/8/09

34- Alamo- Missouri
33- Magicjack/St. Pete- South Florida
32- Sugar- Alabama
31- Rose- USC
30- Insight- Kansas
29- Emerald- California
28- Fiesta- Texas
27- Capital One- Georgia
26- Papajohns.com- Rutgers
25- Motor City- Central Michigan
24- Cotton- Texas Tech
23- Music City- Boston College
22- International- Connecticut
21- Outback- Iowa
20- New Orleans- Troy St.
19- Holiday- Oklahoma State
18- Champs Sports- Florida State
17- BCS Champion- Florida
16- New Mexico- Fresno State
15- Orange- Cincinnati
14- Poinsettia- TCU
13- Sun- Oregon State
12- Meineke Car Care- West Virginia
11- Independence- Northern Illinois
10- Humanitarian- Nevada
9- Eagle Bank- Wake Forest
8- Armed Forces- Houston
7- GMAC- Ball State
6- Gator- Clemson
5- Pioneer/Las Vegas- Arizona
4- Sheraton/Hawaii- Hawaii
3- Liberty- Kentucky
2- Chick-Fil-A- LSU
1- Texas- Western Michigan”

“Looks like you are middle of the road when it comes to Florida's chances.”

“Congrats to the Richmond Spiders who defeated the Montana Grizzlies 24-7 tonight in Chattanooga to become the 2008 NCAA FCS National Champions.”

““Looks like you are middle of the road when it comes to Florida's chances.”

That's OK because the lack of tradition has him in the ditch.”

“I didn't stay in the ditch long. I used the mangled corpse of Nigal's team to climb out. It's not like I stomped all over their tradition. They were face down in the mud anyway.



Chili my boy, liberals just never seem to learn to think with their brains not their emotions.

I see you're picking your nose this year instead of bowls. I hope you got a nice plumber's snake to celebrate bowl season.”

“LOL! Sorry arc. It's all I have to do in the post season with no bowl game to look forward to.”

“Who was it that won that Michigan/Florida bowl game last year?”

“The one with the tradition of winning. DULP! See there I go again.”

“The one without a continuous bowl tradition anymore.


What was the team that showed they were overrated, lost their #1 ranking, AND lost the SEC Championship Game this year?

That is the relevant question for those of us who are living in the present and not on moth-eaten memories.”

“Spoken like a true fan of a team with zero tradition.”