Hiking Kilt

“So, mountain hardwear markets a hiking kilt. Would anyone here consider wearing this thing? Would you laugh at me if I did? Just thinking 'bout all that ventilation through my nether region makes me giddy as a school girl. However, I have no desire to look like a school girl.”

“I could be convinced to wear a kilt, but only if it had a tartan pattern. That plain khaki does not look very manly.”

“Had the same reaction bacpac. Really wanted something less Gap, more Braveheart. But that cool breeze on my twig and berries...”

“For anyone interested...

The product can be found at:
http://www.mountainhardwear.com/web_catalog/product_view.asp?styleid=39&type=APPAREL&rootid=252&id=257&subnavid=&hasChildren=False&isStyle=True&level=7

Thebackpacker Review of the kilt:
http://www.backpacker.com/article/0,2646,1981,00.html”

“I'd only laugh if you wore the wrong shoes with it.

Stiletto heels would look nice.”

“i would wear one if were the tartan of my family.

mccracken family of clan mcnaughton


”

“Bwahahahahahahahah!

Guys hiking in dresses! Now I've heard it all!

Bwahahahahahahahaha!”

“Here's an idea: Stick some plastic pieces of tubing out of your backpack so it looks like a bagpipe. Grow a beard and dye it red. When you come across other hikers, just yell "it's crap!". You see, people will think you're Scottish. Then they'll accept the kilt.”

“You have to be real cheap too, so make sure your gear looks like it's been patched a hundred times.

Copper wire was invented when two Scotsmen saw a penny on the ground at the same time.”

“looks like a neat idea..wouldn't work for me though...it'd kinda be like when your tube for your platypus drags in the dirt”

“OPIE has short legs?”

“*covers mouth and nose*...damn it...now i gotta go wipe my monitor off....”

“So, am I to believe that TTers prefer aesthetics to utility in respect to their gear? If you suffer from painful heat rashes in the crotch/upper thigh area, as I do, this mountain kilt could be a lifesaver. Heat rashes, aka prickly heat, result primarilyfrom inadequate ventilation to the affected skin. (see my Crotch Rashes thread). This kilt would seem to provide enough ventilation so as to prevent this painful condition.

These rashes knocked me off the AT four years ago. After hiking 600 miles, I just couldn't take the pain anymore. My upper thigh at the end was red, inflammed, and blistering. I can't express to you the intense pain I suffered through for several hundred miles.

If I don't get the kilt, I'll have to take other measures to ensure the successful completion of my thru-hike this summer. These include: corn starch or some other drying agent for prevention; benedryl and hydrocortizone for treatment; an extra towel and an extra pair of quick drying hiking shorts to keep the area dry. That seems like alotta #&%!$ to be carrying, especially if the kilt could solve the underlying problem.

Seriously, what would you do if you were me?”

“I packed in skirt before. The guys where so polite the first day. They always let me go first up the steep grades. After the swim in the lake that afternoon I didn’t get the same interest. I guess the mystery was gone. As long a bugs are not a problem it is a good thing, it is cool and breezy. Even more so without knickers. And a gal can pee standing up without contortions.”

“Wear the dress or just cut them off and be done with it! It's just extra weight anyways.”

“Someone on another thread suggested some roll-on stuff that bikers and runners use. I think it was called "Glide" or something like that. Keeps the chafing down, apparently. Search for threads with the word "leg" or "thigh" in them.”

“Y'all are starting to make me real, real nervous! :D”

“It was body glide in a stick
There is a similarly named product that is a sexual lubricant. It would probably work too.”

“Probably tastes better too.”

“Go with the Kilt. I'll try not to laugh. No really who cares how bad it looks. You’re not just going on a weekend overnight. You’re finishing the AT! Lord knows backpackers don’t just buy boots just for their looks. Those goofy looking gaiters are a real site also.”

“what's your height and weight?
you have massive thunder thighs?

I can feel when the chafing starts...so i stop and rearrange my accomedations. Are you chaffing from active thigh rubbage..or just getting a rash and irritation due to damp, warm conditions?

Rubbing used to be a problem..but if you put something between the 2 friction points it'll cut it down...or cut out the friction points...firm the thighs ...

all else fails shave and apply 2nd skin or large adhesive pads”

“and don't wear cordaroy...if your chafing that bad you could cause a hot spot and spark the entire AT to a cinder!!”

“I'm 6'3" 260. My thighs alone weigh more than Kate Moss. While I have chafed in years past, chafing is not the problem here. If chafing was the cause, I'd expect to suffer in any weather. These rashes appeared only when the weather turned hot and humid. They are heat rashes ("prickly heat"), which result from constant moisture/sweat 'gainst the skin. The moisture causes the rash by clogging the skin's pores.

If chafing were the issue, I'd think the kilt would aggravate the condition, there being nothing between the thighs to prevent the rubbing. But since the problem is sweat 'gainst the skin, the kilt is ideal, since it'll allow the ventilation to dry the area. And there won't be any material clinging to the skin which is itself saturated with sweat.”

“what about just gettng baggier shorts”

“ya but whats the sitting method for a kilt...leg crossing may work for the ladies but.....

ok , sit how ya like but keep yer back to me ok?”

“I might try it!!!!

I bet you would have a nice draft in the summer if it got too hot.

8)”

“try stay free maxi pads...especially the ones with the wings...also the extra absorbant ones could help too.

I'm laughing so hard, my co workers think Im back here just playing around...

scuse me...but my kilt is blowing in the breeze. better carry a broadsword with you to chop off the heads of insurgents and infidels.”

“Ya wage are out on the trail Stikmon!!!!!!

8)”

“Make sure it's a backpacking broadsword. The regular ones are so heavy.”

“Ya no doubt Titanium Broadsword.


8)”

“Broadswords...talk about infidels....surely you are talking about the scottish claymore..not the british broadsword...aye...buncha heathens”

“Get a real kilt - not some sissified yuppie skirt. You could use it like the real Scott warriors, as yer blanket instead of a sleeping bag.”

“So I am a heathen.

8)”

“Don't think baggier shorts would help much, since they'll still cling to the skin when wet.”

“Heck, if I wore a kilt, we wouldn't need blazes on the trail, just follow the deep inbeeed line in the dirt.”

“I don't know where you've been my boy but I see you've won first prize!

-Rowdy drinking song lyric”

“god, this is TTOOOO funny

Is that a real kilt or a sears kilt?

Is that a bannana in your kilt or are you just happy to see me?

Give me a kilt or give me death...oh so sorry, thats give me liberty or a kilt...either will do nicely.

nice kilt...come on bubba, lets make em squeel like a pig. ooooooiiiinnnkkkkkkkkkkk.”

“Just ordered a mountain kilt to try it out. Laugh all you want, you jackals, but when I complete my thru-hike this summer rash-free, it'll be me laughing.”

“Somebody's bucking for a new trail name!”

“inbeeed = inbred?”

“just hope my new trail name isn't something girly”

“Hey, if it helps with the butt-rash...

And yeah, go with the plaid.



That is One Sick Pic, Fathermucker, BOL”

“Honey Bear had the same problem on his 2000 thru-hike.
Dude finished it by wearing a sarong.”

“Hmmm...guy called Honey Bear in a sarong...now I'm having waking nightmares...”

“What's sarong with that?”

“It's just sarong.”

“If I pull off wearing the sarong on the llama Ramma around camp, I may move to the trail kilt.”

“Everyone will be wearing a skirt on the trail in time. They'll say 'bout me: "Chips, he was an innovator. A great man, with giant balls. He is the alpha and the omega, the truth and the light. Praise to the all powerful Chips, our saviour." Then they'll gather 100 virgins and sacrifice them to appease my all-consuming anger.

So suck it.”

“Let me get my eye-dropper...”